It’s All About Tang Bingyao

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“Oh, you’re fighting!” Lin Feng shouted over High School 13’s voice chat. “Awesome! I’m coming in hot!” His Lulu was in the mid lane, which wasn’t all that far from the Dragon pit where Vayne and Kalista were fighting. He sped down the river towards the fight, cheering Tang Bingyao on for the engage she found on the Kalista.

Shanghai High School and High School 13’s Toplaners both retreated back to their outer towers. They had Teleport precisely for these kinds of situations. The Gragas teleported to a ward at the Red team’s Blue Buff Camp. He started channeling half a second earlier than Irelia, who teleported to a ward at the river entrance in the bot lane.

Lin Feng’s Lulu caught up to Vayne. The Leona had just missed two of her skillshots, while Kalista was still pinned against the wall. He sent Pix  over to aid the Vayne in her attacks–Help, Pix! Then he threw a Glitterlance at Kalista!

Tang Bingyao had her Vayne continue auto attacking the Kalista. Two silver rings appeared around Kalista. She was one auto attack away from dying when the Gragas appeared from the Red team’s Jungle. He Body Slammed towards Vayne in a desperate attempt to save Kalista. But Tang Bingyao had kept Tumble just for this. Her Vayne dodged the Body Slam and fired an empowered silver bolt at Kalista.

《You have slain an enemy!》

Tang Bingyao smiled. I got the kill! Then she focused back on the fight. Shanghai High School had four champions left alive, two of whom were trying to attack her. Well, one. She’d seen Lin Feng cast Whimsy on the Gragas, polymorphing him into a useless critter. Why is Leona sticking to the Gragas? Hmm, probably waiting for Yasuo and Lee Sin to arrive. Where are they?

Chen Ze’s Irelia had arrived at the Dragon pit right around the same time the Gragas had. He’d first ran towards Kalista, but she died too quickly. So he turned towards the little critter Gragas and dashed at him with Bladesurge. Then she struck out hard with her blades and stunned him–Equilibrium Strike!

Zeng Rui’s Leona had little in terms of damage and he’d already used most of his crowd control skills. He looked at his minimap and cursed. The Lee Sin and Yasuo were both running over from the base, where they’d gone to buy some wards in preparation for the Dragon. His two teammates were too far away from the fight, he needed to buy them more time. His Leona only had one more crowd control skill available, which was her ultimate skill. I need to at least hit the Vayne.

Zeng Rui shouted over his team’s voice chat, “Get ready to pull back when I stun that Vayne!” Then he pushed down on the R key–Solar Flare! He pointed his sword up into the sky and called down a beam of solar energy. The incredibly powerful force came quickly, smashing down onto the Vayne and Lulu. Stunned!

An Xin’s Nami was also late to the fight because she’d returned to the base to buy wards. But unlike the Lee Sin and Yasuo, she was already on her way back towards the bot lane when the fight broke out. She arrived right as Leona’s Solar Flare came down. Then she watched Leona and Gragas running away. Trying to escape? Watch this. She activated her Nami’s ultimate, calling forth a Tidal Wave that came surging after the Leona and Gragas!

The two champions from Shanghai High School were caught in the Jungle entrance. There was nowhere to escape to. The water towered over them and then came crashing down, knocking them down and then up into the air!

Vayne and Lulu broke free from the stun. They joined Chen Ze’s Irelia in chasing after the Gragas and focusing their firepower on him. Leona was a Support who’d used all her skills. They could ignore her for now. Blades cut the Gragas, silver bolts struck him, and magical glitter stuck to him. His health disappeared.

《Double kill!》

Tang Bingyao was so focused that she didn’t even hear the voice announcer. Her last attack on the Gragas was a silver bolt empowered by Tumble. She had done this not only for the extra damage, but also to get an angle on the Leona. She took the large crossbow from her back and fired. A large, heavy bolt struck the Leona and pinned her to the Jungle wall behind her.

Shanghai High School’s Lee Sin and Yasuo finally arrived at the fight. They were about to jump in and help Zeng Rui’s Leona escape, when their team captain’s voice sounded out over the team’s voice chat, “Back, you idiots! They’re with five! Don’t give them any more kills!”

Zeng Rui stared at his screen, frustrated. All my skills are on cooldown. If they go in, it’s no different from a 2vs5. We’d just be feeding Vayne even more kills! Dammit! He gritted his teeth as he watched one last silver bolt fly at his Leona.

《Triple kill!》

High School 13’s students in the audience were stamping their feet on the ground and waving their arms over their heads. They were screaming about how Tang Bingyao had picked up a triple kill, and they were shouting about how they were only half a step away from winning the tournament! The students who’d been given the large posters at the start of the series proudly held them up again.


Westwind had been play-by-play shoutcasting the entire fight. He wiped the sweat off his forehead and screamed into his microphone, “HIGH SCHOOL 13! WOOOOO! Look at their students! They’re certain of it! They’re going to be the Champions of Shanghai! And man, I can’t blame them. Just look at that Vayne! She’s 6/1/2! I don’t know how Shanghai High School plans on killing her. Impossible if you ask me!”

“Not impossible,” Silent Reed disagreed. She looked at the large screen, which showed High School 13 taking the second Dragon of the game. Then a graph appeared at the bottom of the screen showing the stats of the two teams. High School 13 was 4,000 gold ahead. “You see that gold difference, West? That’s all on the Vayne. High School 13 is pumping all their resources into her. Shanghai High School can win this. They just have to shut her down.”

“You say that like it’s an easy thing to do!” Westwind argued. “Did we just watch the same fight? Or the one before that? Shanghai High School has been trying to shut the Vayne down all game! But look at her score! 6/1/2! She’s unstoppable!”

Silent Reed smiled. Awesome work, girls! Then she said, “The Vayne is doing really well. And I really want to see the two girls from High School 13 winning. But let’s be real here, West. If. And this is a very big if, Shanghai High School can instagib the Vayne, they’ll win this game. It’s doable. High School 13 can’t get complacent.”

“Fair enough, fair enough,” Westwind agreed. “This game is still wide open! Shanghai High School has some incredible potential to pick off a target and burst them down. They just need to have their Gragas or Lee Sin working together with Yasuo. Maybe have Leona help with her crowd control for full effect. And then they also can’t take too much damage from the rest of High School 13’s team. And, and… There’s a lot of things that have to fall perfectly in place for them.”

Zeng Rui looked over the edge of his screen at the audience. He could feel the vibrations from their jumping, which was incredibly distracting. Then he glanced sideways at his teammates. They looked lost. Can’t blame them. We’re falling pretty far behind. But it’s not over yet. We still have a chance. Just have to kill that Vayne. He nodded and said over the team’s voice chat, “Keep your focus. We’re one good fight from winning this.”

Lin Feng grinned and said over the team’s voice chat, “That was awesome! But we gotta play safe now! Tang Tang doesn’t have her Flash!” He looked over at Tang Bingyao sitting next to him and nodded at her. Then he continued, “Me and BunBun will protect you. Chen Ze and Liu Yue, you two dive Shanghai High School’s backline. Time to win this!”

Tang Bingyao nodded and said, “Ok.”

An Xin smiled and suggested over the team’s voice chat, “Tang Tang still has a few minutes before her Flash is up again. We’ll wait for it to come off cooldown before we start another teamfight. Sounds good, guys?”

An Xin had made it sound like a suggestion, but the others all took it as an order. They held back on the aggression and slowed down the pace of the game. Shanghai High School was more than happy with this arrangement. They would use every extra second to help their Gragas and Yasuo scale.

There wasn’t a whole lot that happened over the next several minutes. Both teams focused on farming minions and jungle camps, and staying far away from each other. But that didn’t mean they were blind to good gank opportunities. Shanghai High School found two of them. The first happened in the top lane, where Chen Ze’s Irelia got a little too comfortable farming under her tower. Lee Sin suddenly appeared behind her and roundhouse kicked her towards the Gragas, who followed up with his own ultimate. The Explosive Cask knocked Irelia halfway across the lane toward the Red team’s outer tower.

《You have slain an enemy!》

The second kill happened in the bot lane. Shanghai High School’s Yasuo roamed down from mid, evading the wards High School 13 had dropped down, and burst into the lane. Tang Bingyao and An Xin were warned by Lin Feng only seconds before. But the Leona was already engaging. She tried to hit Tang Bingyao with a solar projection of her sword–Zenith Blade! But An Xin had her Nami body block for the Vayne. Tang Bingyao managed to escape on the back of that, but An Xin wasn’t so lucky.

《You have slain an enemy!》

Two kills went to Shanghai High School, but that didn’t change much for the overall game. Tang Bingyao was still strong and continuing to get stronger. But that didn’t mean High School 13 could keep giving away kills. They started playing more carefully, waiting for the third Dragon to spawn. “We’re going to force the next teamfight,” An Xin said over the team’s voice chat.

At 23 minutes, the third Dragon was about to spawn. Shanghai High School arrived at the Dragon pit far in advance to set up a wall of vision. They couldn’t back down from this teamfight. High School 13 absolutely couldn’t be allowed to get a third dragon. Plus, they finally felt strong enough to challenge High School 13 in a teamfight. Yasuo and Gragas had both picked up kills in the last couple of minutes and upgraded their items with the extra gold. If they got the pick on Vayne, they could burst her down.

“It’s about to go down!” Westwind shouted into his microphone. “Shanghai High School has been clawing their way back into this game! Gragas and Yasuo have the damage to one-shot Vayne!”

Silent Reed giggled and said, “What you’re saying is that Shanghai High School is looking for the engage, right West? They need to get the pick on Vayne and win the teamfight on the back of that.”

Westwind nodded and replied, “Exactly! And this is going to be it as well! Whoever wins this teamfight will probably go on to win the game! It’s do or die! Can High School 13 protect their Vayne for long enough? Or will Shanghai High School get the pick they need to finally turn this game around? They could force a potential Game 5! How exciting would that be!”

The High School 13 students in the audience were shifting around on their seats, unable to contain their worries, nerves, and excitement. They talked amongst each other about everything the casters were saying, including remarks about their school winning the tournament.

“Just imagine,” one High School 13 student said to his friends sitting next to him. “If they win this, we’re the Champions! We might actually win!”

“Might? We’re going to win!” one of his friends responded.
“But what if they catch Tang Tang? Didn’t the casters just say how—”
“No! Don’t say it! Positive thoughts only! We’re going to win this! Our team can do this! Mark my words, we’re going to become the best esports school in Shanghai!”
“I hope so, I really do…”
“Oh, shut up with your stupid pessimism! GO HIGH SCHOOL 13! YOU CAN DO IT, TANG TANG!”

Sietse Explores HuyaTV

Sietse Thought: For Rise related reasons, I was scrolling through HuyaTV earlier today. This journey started and ended on their frontpage, with some of the more popular streams. I opened them to see what they were about. Sounds innocent enough, right? There was a CS:GO stream and a League stream and it looked totally wholesome. That all changed when I got to the third one. Five girls with cat ear filters (yes, they were using filters for jewelry and cat ears…) were talking with each other, sometimes. In the five minutes that I watched, there were more than a few awkward silences. But I didn’t know what they were talking about, so maybe I was just missing out on something very funny.

ALL OF THAT paled in comparison with the next and final Huya stream I opened. There was a girl with 10,000s of viewers singing. Now, this wasn’t good singing. It sounded like the dying throes of a cat. The sound was so bad that I tore my headphones off! It was that bad! And there were 10,000+ people listening to that! Why were there 10,000+ people listening to that? Did they turn the sound off or something? Why would anyone suffer through that? And more importantly, in what world did that girl think she could sing?

I’m still in shock, as you guys might’ve noticed. My ears are also still ringing. That shit was awful. So can anyone explain to me why there were so many people listening to what I can only describe as a wailing cat? Please, I can’t rest until I know the answer to this mystery!

Shanks Thought: I had to do a double take when Sietse mentioned, “Huya TV”. I thought he was talking about Twitch. But nope. He actually went on Huya! I didn’t even know you could access that site from the west without a Chinese VPN. My mind is completely blown. 

Sietse has been exposed to the degeneracy that is Chinese streaming culture. Thank god he doesn’t understand Chinese. Or else we’ll see him a few months down the line, listening to Huya streamer girls thanking him for his “rocket” on repeat. 

“Why were there 10,000+ people listening to that? Did they turn the sound off or something?”

You underestimate the thirst of Chinese guys. It’s a country of over 1.4 billion people, with a huge disparity between males and females thanks to the One Child Policy. Chinese dudes are like Lemmings. They’ll throw themselves off a cliff just to get a taste of the poon. 

Also, filters are pretty common in Chinese streaming. Almost every female Chinese streamer is using a live filter. It makes their chins smaller, and their faces really sickly pale. I guarantee most of them do not look like how they’re shown in streams in real life.

Sietse Addendum: I honestly was already surprised that they put on jewelry and cat ears through filters. Hadn’t even gotten around to looking at anything else. Man, who thinks people look like that? And who likes people who see themselves as that? This has only increased my confusion. It doesn’t make sense! Why do they do this! A filter isn’t going to fix the low image you have of yourself! Don’t be a fake, work on yourself in real life!

Shanks Addendum: This message was brought to you by Sietse Thundercock.

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