You Perverts!

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Kassadin’s plan was flawless. He’d blink on top of the Vayne with Riftwalk and then kill him with a Nether Blade. It would happen so quickly that the Vayne wouldn’t even know what happened. There was nothing the Vayne could do to stop him. She would only have milliseconds to react before death! His plan was flawless, perfect, you could even say it was beautiful. But that perfection that existed in his mind shattered when he actually tried to do it. The instant he blinked out of the brush and got to where the Vayne was, he found himself standing alone in the river with an impotent Nether Blade. The Vayne had disappeared! She’d vanished so fast that he didn’t even see it happening. But he had no time to think or act or pivot around. A thick, heavy bolt struck him squarely in the chest and pinned him to a wall!

The muffled impact from Kassadin was the catalyst for the people watching the stream to erupt and verbally scream like they were trying to go Super Sayajin!

HOLY WUTT!?!?! is he scripting? he must be scripting right? That reaction spee what the actual fuk…..

The man at the center of it all was completely oblivious to the uproar in chat. All of Lin Feng’s attention was squarely focused on the Kassadin. After stunning Kassadin with Condemn, Vayne fired off a silver bolt. She followed up with a Tumble to land the third silver bolt. The three silver rings around the Kassadin detonated with true damage.

Vayne fell into a dance of auto-attacking, repositioning, and kiting. Over and over again. Not only did it whittle down the Kassadin’s health, the lifesteal from her items allowed her to heal all the way back to a safe buffer. That’s when Rumble rushed over. He plowed straight at the Kassadin and fired off two harpoons–Electro Harpoon! They pierced and electrocuted the Kassadin, simultaneously dealing damage and applying a slow. Rumble then activated his flamethrower and scorched everything in front of him–Flamespitter!

Kassadin’s health dropped fast. He tried to Riftwalk away, smashing the R key while waiting for the stun from Condemn to break. But one-and-a-half seconds were an eternity with two enemies attacking. He only had a sliver of health left when the stun finally broke. But it was enough. He blinked away with Riftwalk. Away from the river. Away from the Rumble. And definitely away from the Vayne. But he didn’t notice that single solitary silver bolt following him. Literally right when his Riftwalk ended, the arrow found its mark and emptied the last bit of his health bar. He collapsed dead on the ground.


In his hotel room in London, Nightsong leaned back in his chair. He glanced over to Hermes and said, “Would ya look at them apples? Can I call it or what? I told you this Water Wraith shit was a fucking fantastic Vayne!”

“Yes, yes. You’re a god whose eyes pierce the veil and see truths the rest of us cannot. You were right.” Hermes nodded. He stared at his screen for another second before turning to Nightsong. “I gotta say something though. I’ve seen you play Vayne. A lot. And now I just watched this guy play Vayne. I’m thinking… well, I’m starting to think that this Vayne is so much more reliable than your Vayne. He shows up for every teamfight. Oh! He also showed up right when I needed him to help me get that kill before. He’s always exactly where he needs to be, right when you need him to be. What a team player, right?”

Nightsong glared at his friend. “My dick! You wanna start something here? I’ll show you my Vayne’s dick! Mine is bigger and better. It’s like a fucking third leg! This little shit’s got a toothpick! Nothing on me. Ya dig?”

“Well… you were dead for that whole teamfight. Damn, your Blitzcrank is pretty unreliable too now that I’m thinking about it… But you had all the time in the world to see how he played that. Think you could’ve done it better? That Vayne is Zen! Did you notice how he held onto his Flash until the very last moment? He didn’t waste a single ability. Tell me man, could you have done it better? Do you really think you could’ve played that teamfight better?” Hermes asked with a smile.

Nightsong had nothing to say. He had watched the whole fight, from how Vayne escaped from the Irelia, chased down the Nami and killed the Jarvan IV to how he held his Flash through all of this for the Kassadin. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t impressed. This Vayne had played the teamfight to perfection and it stung. He would’ve died to the Kassadin after wasting his Flash on chasing down the Nami or the Jarvan.

“God damn! You really want to do this whole ‘fiddle-dee-dee look how much better than you is he’ thing? Go for it! You just want to mess with me and I know it. But it’s not going to work. I don’t give a flying fuck about that Vayne! My Vayne’s dick is bigger. It’s the best! I am the best Vayne player and that’s that!” Nightsong barked.

Hermes shook his head and grinned. Then he turned his attention back on the game. Or to be more precise, back onto the Vayne. “I think we’re watching the birth of a new pro in the scene. He’s got the eye of the tiger, he plays for the thrill of the fight. I think we’re going to see him rising up to the challenge.” he mumbled.

Lin Feng shook his head. He was mildly miffed. The teamfight went great, he was happy with how he played that. Picking up a quadra kill was pretty fun too. But his KDA was now 7/1/1. That one death, all because he’d gotten distracted and careless. He grumbled, “If I didn’t screw up in lane that one time… Why’d I give that kill away? I would’ve gotten a godlike if I didn’t…”

The chat had no sympathy for Lin Feng. The people watching the stream jumped on the chance to make fun of him and pour a little bit more salt on his misery.

lul! now you realize
Whose fault is it for showing off!
karmas a bitch ey? and i don’t mean the champion!!!! shes cute and hot and totally bangable

The viewers were poking a little fun at Lin Feng. But when all was said and done, they’d come to respect him. New or old viewers, all of them were thoroughly impressed with his Vayne. Especially this quadrakill that was nothing short of breathtaking! There were several diehard Nightsong fans in chat, and even they had to admit that no one could’ve played that teamfight better than Lin Feng had. Not even Nightsong himself!

After this last teamfight, the Blue team was up two Dragons and two towers, and their mid and ad-carry were fed. The advantage they held over the Red team was overwhelming. Nothing short of a miracle or some serious griefing would let the Red team make a comeback. But that wasn’t about to happen with two professional players and Lin Feng on the same team. The rest of the game was much calmer. There were no more flashy plays, no unnecessary risks. Only solid teamwork.

The Blue team’s synergy started to shine. Nightsong had learned his lesson after overextending and dying. His playstyle changed to one that was more serious and wary. As the Support, he was the shotcaller. He led his team around the map, searching for targets to hook. Whenever he found an enemy champion, he’d Rocket Grab them. Veigar followed up with an Event Horizon. Stuns piled onto stuns with an extra side of stun. All the while Vayne would be unloading her silver bolts on them. They died so fast that Veigar didn’t even have the time to use his ultimate half of the time. Neither did Vayne or Rumble. They were just that much stronger than the Red team.

Lin Feng stayed in the backline along with Veigar. He never walked in front of his Blitzcrank, never left himself exposed to attack. He only went in on enemy champions that were within attack range and already engaged by the Blitzcrank. Vayne had such a large item advantage over the Red team that it didn’t matter who she attacked, they all died the same. There was no escape. It didn’t even matter how much armor the Red team champions stacked to defend themselves against her, it just wasn’t enough.

“Sweet! My Vayne is really really strong! I can probably 1vs5 them now!” Lin Feng exclaimed, smiling.

The chat had no response. Most of them were new to the stream, and just didn’t know Lin Feng well enough to react. They couldn’t tell if he was serious or joking or delusional. But the viewers who’d been watching for a while now had more experience with Lin Feng and his quirkiness. They knew he was different and not like the other streamers. So, earlier on, one of them had suggested a copypasta in the QQ group chat. One that they’d spam in chat whenever Lin Feng had one of his special moments.

uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!
uWu! I’ve never seen such a shameless person in my life! uWu!

The entire chat was blotted out by walls of this message that were constructed over and over again. This was a sort of tribute from the chat, one usually reserved for the most popular streamers who had large and very loyal communities. On that note, Su Xue’s stream was growing quickly. The viewer count was over 6,000! It was something that Su Xue never even dreamed would happen! She would have been screaming, “WHAT? OVER 6000? That can’t be!” But Su Xue was still sleeping, and this wasn’t a dream. Lin Feng, with a little help from Hermes and Nightsong, had done it!

After the first game, Lin Feng jumped straight into a second, riding the momentum and chasing the high. That game was another quick and easy win. So was the third. But when it came to the fourth game, things took a bit of a left turn. In the last two games, it didn’t make that much of a difference if the other lanes lost. As long as they didn’t give up and go AFK or grief by walking into the enemy tower every time they respawned, he could still carry to a win. In the fourth game, none of that happened. But something similar and just as annoying did happen. A teammate who was so bad that all they accomplished was feeding, even while trying to play seriously. All of the kills created enough of an advantage that it no longer mattered how well Lin Feng played, the game was unsalvageable.

“Well, this was unexpected… That Tryndamere is ridiculously boosted,” Lin Feng concluded after looking at the numbers in the end game lobby.

Chat had come to a similar conclusion much earlier in the game and said so then, and agreed once more.

Yeah! That trynd could feed an entire nation!
such a shame! you were doing so amazing with your yasuo
that game was unwinnable with how bad that trynd was
Report him for inting! Report him!

Not a single person watching the stream doubted Lin Feng. Not anymore. No one tried to argue that Lin Feng wasn’t that good either. Lin Feng had united every single person watching with his gameplay. They were happy when he was happy and angry when he got mad. He was their streamer, and they were his chat.

Lin Feng read through the chat and engaged with the viewers, a wide grin on his face. There were a lot of messages flooding in. So many that he was starting to have a hard time keeping up. At first he thought people were just typing fast, but there were just too many messages for that. He eventually got curious enough to investigate and looked at the viewer count. His eyes stopped for a moment. Then he rubbed them and looked again. “Oh WOW! This is crazy! There’s so many of you! You guys seeing how many of you there are in here? Oh. Wait. Did you guys already know?”

Lin Feng was so surprised that he shouted while saying that, and it woke Su Xue up. She rubbed her eyes, still drowsy, and then dragged herself out of her comfy cocoon of blankets and pillows. She pushed herself up and looked over at Lin Feng. “The hell are you yelling for? Trying to wake the whole neighborhood up?” She grabbed her phone to look at the time. “Oh, right. It’s almost 12? Alright. Fine. You’re lucky your shift is almost done. If you’d woken me up early…”

She stretched and yawned one more time. Then she cracked her back and shook off the grogginess. “Alright, I’m up! We can switch.” She walked over to Lin Feng, still in her pajamas, and ruffled his hair. “What were you screaming about anyway?”

“Oh! Look! You’re going to be so happy! Look! Look!” Lin Feng said while jabbing his finger at the monitor. Unfortunately, his excitement and his finger also blocked Su Xue from seeing the viewer count.

Su Xue pushed Lin Feng aside and looked at the screen. Her heart stopped for a moment as her mouth fell open. She moved a little closer as all the sleep left her face and was replaced with shock. “S-s-six t-t-thous–” The shock was too much for her. She leaned on the desk and forced herself to breathe. “SIX THOUSAND? How? Lin Feng how did you do it?”

A certain demographic of the viewers, a very specific subset, had already feasted their eyes on the heavenly sight of the sleeping Su Xue. But seeing her in her pajamas, that was an entirely different dimension of enticing. The thin fabric accentuated her curves, and the stream lights highlighted the sheerness of the material. They stopped breathing. They could only sit there drooling with their eyes locked on the screen staring at the beautiful woman who had appeared on the webcam feed.

Is xue xue going naked on stream?
I didn’t know the stream provided these kinds of services too!
clipped it dn saved it!
this is THE BEST STREAM!! Nightsong, Hermes, now this. OMG!

Su Xue noticed what was being talked about in chat before it went on for too long. Or too far. Her eyes turned into round saucers as she glanced at the webcam feed and saw herself showing off her body in her scanty and translucent pajamas! She quickly wrapped her arms around her chest and screamed at the camera, “What! You freaking perverts! Close your eyes! CLOSE THEM NOW!”

Shanks Shows Dev "Something Big"

The Raging Fist of the Heavenly Winged Gilded Dragon Who Protects Kunlun, Who Flew Higher than the Vermillion Bird, Tamed the White Tiger, Wrestled the Black Turtle, Shamed the Azure Dragon with his Splendor, Patron Spirit of All Warriors, Dispelled the Curse of Multi-level Marketing, Gave the Wu-Tang Clan the gift of Rhyme, and Strikes Fear into the Hearts of all Robocallers Translation Group presents:

A Devshard x Shanks Short:

Devshard walked into Shanks’ apartment. He already had the key, Shanks had given it to him a while ago. The lights were off. Mellow light from dim, flickering candles flowed and waved through the living room instead. Shanks was already on the couch, lounging in a pair of joggers.

“Do you just never wear a shirt at home or is that something special you do for me?” Devshard asked. Shanks wasn’t wearing a shirt. This was the first time that Devshard thought about it, but he’d never walked into Shanks’ place before and saw him wearing a shirt. Not that Devshard minded. Shanks had a nice body. To him, anyway. He was into a cuddly Dad-bod. Or perhaps a Rilakuma.

Shanks shifted a little on the couch and then stared straight into Devshard’s eyes. Into Devshard’s soul. His voice husky with flecks of chocolate gravel, “I’ve been waiting for you to get here for so long! There’s something I need to show you.”

Devshard looked back at Shanks with the same intensity. “Oh? I tried to get here as soon as I could. But you know how it is, things just pop up with the whole doctoring thing or editing. But I’m here now. What do you have to show me?”

Shanks patted a spot on the couch next to him. So close that he was half-patting his own thigh. “Sit down. You gotta see this!”

Devshard settled down onto the couch next to Shanks. He leaned over onto Shanks in that easy, comfortable way that the best couples do. Shanks put one arm around Devshard’s shoulders and pulled out his phone.

“It’s this new webnovel on WuxiaWorld! Necropolis Immortal! Etvo’s doing it, and it’s the most interesting cultivation novel I’ve seen in a long ass time! The main character is this badass Indiana Jones who runs around excavating tombs, solving ancient puzzles, and finding treasure. BUT HE’S ALSO A CULTIVATOR! IT’S LITERALLY WHAT AN INDIANA JONES MOVIE WHERE HE’S A CULTIVATING MARTIAL ARTIST NECROMANCER WOULD BE!”

Devshard looked over at the phone. “I didn’t know I wanted a webnovel about a cultivating, tomb raiding Indiana Jones character. Actually, it’s kinda like that 3rd Riddick movie. Chronicles of Riddick or whatever. But now that I know this exists, I definitely want to read it!”

Hey guys! This is just our fun way of doing a shout out for Necropolis Immortal, a new novel here on WuxiaWorld. It’s being translated by our very good friend Etvolare. She’s a great translator and the novel’s good. Give it a shot. Don’t drop Rise to read it or anything like that. But give it a shot. Also, Etvo’s pretty cool. She’s been playing LoL for a long time now (and sometimes streams her games) and she recently started playing TFT.

Check NECRO out here!

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