Lin Feng clenched his fist and pumped it up in the air. He shouted, “WIN! See how good my Zed is?” He grinned and watched the red energy explode from the Nexus and morph into the ‘Victory’ emblem. My Zed is way too good! Way too good… I should 1vs1 Shi Hang on stream one of these days! Then I could show them just how good my Zed exactly is! Yeah! That’d be fun!– Right, XueXue and something big… He turned his head to look at Su Xue and asked, “What big news? What were you talking about?”
「YEAH! cant just make us hot like this! TELL US OR WE RIOT!」
「dont be mad with us, were just dumb viewers who are far too curious…. NOW TELL US!」
「tell me tell me tell me tell me」
「I wonder what it could be about… You guys think she got engaged or something?」
「LOL, with who??? What guy would wanna date her when she streams 20 hours a day????」
「ME! ME! I WOULD! MEMEMMEMEMEMEME!!!!」
Su Xue looked at the camera and gave a fake, sarcastic laugh in response. She then sat up a little straighter and raised her nose. She said, “A Huya admin contacted me. He said he wants to discuss something important with me. When I asked him what it was about, he said it had to do with my stream and that it was a massive opportunity! Like… THIS big!” She reached her hands out as far as she could.
「huya dude thinkin he has a big dick. Lololololol」
「xuexue getting trolled by huya…..」
「our xuexue is waaaaaaaay too innocent」
Lin Feng raised an eyebrow and asked, “Is that all? Didn’t he tell you what the big news is? So you don’t really have big news? Just a Huya admin telling you he has big news for you…?”
Su Xue’s smile froze. The corners of her lips slowly fell a brief moment later. She then scratched the back of her head and said, “Uhh, well… Yeah. But he told me it was really big and that I’d be super happy with it!”
「this is big news!? my gawd why did i get all excited for this crap….????」
「XueXue, you’re really too gullible! Just because they tell you it’s big doesn’t mean it’s actually big news!」
「so an admin wants to chat with you (in person????) about something big he has for you??? Oh poor xuexue, you’re so gullible!」
「xuexue is too pure for the internet, that’s why I watch her. She’s like a cute, little, very stupid puppy!」
Su Xue rolled her eyes back and said, “Fine. Whatever! You guys keep roasting and trolling and bitching all you want! I don’t care about any of you!” She shook her head and mumbled, “Sheesh, just wanted to share the good news that Huya has something big for me…”
「ah okay, I understand it! YOU”RE DUMPING US FOR THIS HUYA DUDE!!!!!」
「Wooow! Getting cocky right away just because some dude told you he has something big for you, huh? I get it! You don’t want us anymore! FINE! WE DON”T WANT YOU EITHER! PACK IT UP< BOYS! WE”RE LEAVING!」
「YEAH! weve been far too nice to her! She’s gotten cocky time to put her back in her place!」
「fellow comrades, new and old, follow me into mass reporting and mass unfollowing! Teach the maid who has the power here!」
「We hold the power!」
「YOU”RE OUR SLAVE STUPID MAID!!!1!!!」
“What the fuck!” Su Xue yelped. She threw her hands up in the air and complained, “What’s wrong with you guys? I’m sorry! Okay? I’m sorry! Sheesh! I would never throw you guys away! I love you all! We’re one big family here! You’re all my brothers and sisters!” She looked into the camera and smiled and blinked, like a puppy. She then said, “Come oooooon! Please, don’t leave me! I wouldn’t ever leave you guys! Pleaaase!”
✹
Su Xue fell back in her gaming chair after turning her stream off and sighed loudly. She shook her head and complained, “Those god damn viewers are such a pissy bunch! Who did they learn this shitty behaviour from!? I bet you that other streamers don’t have such ungrateful bastards watching them!”
“But your stream is getting really big!” Lin Feng countered. He clicked on the match history and glossed through it. Another round of all wins! Won three at the end on Zed there as well! But still… I need to play against better players… He shook his head and said to Su Xue, “You’ll be the number 1 female streamer on Huya soon! That’s really impressive you know!”
“Yep! I know!” Su Xue replied, smiling. She then grabbed a cardboard crown from a pile next to her desk and put it on. She said, “I’ll be the queen of Huya!”
Lin Feng looked at her, confused. Then he grinned. He struck his victory pose and shouted, “And I’ll be the king!”
“No you won’t,” Su Xue replied. She shook her head and continued, “You’re the stream’s little bro! You can be a prince or something!”
Lin Feng scratched the back of his head and grinned awkwardly. He said, “Oh, yeah, guess you’re right. Right! So what did that Huya admin want from you anyway? You really don’t know?”
Su Xue shrugged and explained, “Yeah, I really don’t know. I told the stream what he told me. It’s supposedly really good news and will help my stream get really big though. So I’m kinda really excited for it!”
“Oh, I see. Makes sense…” Lin Feng mumbled. He then glanced at the clock on the wall. His eyes went wide. He grabbed his phone to double check the time. He then turned to look at Su Xue and exclaimed, “Hey! Isn’t it delivery time? I want a chicken cutlet!”
Su Xue followed Lin Feng’s gaze to the clock. Oh my god! It’s already 2 A.M! Takeout? She pinched her eyes closed and said, “You want food now? It’s 2! You’ve got… I don’t know! Something in the morning, right? You need to go to bed and sleep! No one can function on no sleep! What do you think? That I go to bed at 4 and then wake up at 6? No! I go to bed at 4, wake up at 6 to make you breakfast, and then go back to bed! Humans need their sleep! You need to sleep!”
Lin Feng shook his head and argued, “I only have a couple more weeks to climb to the top of the Korean ladder! I can catch up on sleep when I’ve done that! Now I need to play!”
Su Xue’s mouth fell open. She stared at Lin Feng and asked, “You… you still want to play? Tonight? Didn’t you just play a whole tournament match today? Well, technically yesterday…– And the games on stream too! Haven’t you had enough…?”
“Nah, I’m fine!” Lin Feng said, grinning. He downed the glass of water in front of him and then struck his victory pose. He shouted, “It’s time to PLAY!” He continued grinning and kept his eyes wide open. Yeah I’m tired! Yeah I wanna sleep! But this isn’t the time to sleep! I want to know how much I improved from those games against Shi Hang! And I need to play more on the Korean server anyway! I’ll play at least one game! That’s one game closer to the Top 3! I know One only said Top 5, but I’m going for the Top 3! That just means I need that much more time! I have to play more! More! MORE!
Su Xue looked at Lin Feng through narrowed eyes. You’re not fooling me, you punk! You can barely keep your eyes open! But… She pursed her lips. I really wanna see you play on the Korean server… Maybe you get to play with Lightless again! How cool would that be! Just one game. Yeah! I’ll let you play one game! That’ll be fine! She smiled and said, “Alright. One game. I’ll go call the chicken place around the corner. Be right back!”
✹
Su Xue walked back into her room with a plastic bag in her hand. Steam was rising up from it, as was the strong smell of chicken. She put the bag down on the desk next to Lin Feng and looked at his screen. Her eyes went wide. He’d already logged onto his Korean account and was waiting in the queue. But what drew her attention was a private message chat that was blinking on the bottom of the client. She grabbed Lin Feng by his shoulder and shouted, “It’s Lightless! He’s messaging you! Lightless is messaging you!”
Lin Feng hovered his mouse over the chat and mumbled, “Oh, him again?” He opened the chat box and read the messages.
CN•Lightless:「Heeeeey! You down for a duo?」
CN•Lightless:「I can play jungle!」
CN•Lightless:「It’d be a real honour to play with a legend like you again!」
Su Xue stared at the chat, stunned. Shocked! Lin Feng a legend? W-what? Since when…? She glanced at Lin Feng and then back at the chat with Lightless. A legend? What is this about? Lightless plays in the LPL! Who does he think Lin Feng is!?
Lin Feng looked at the messages that just kept on coming and shook his head. Guess he thinks I’m One. Eh, don’t wanna play with him right now anyway.
CN•HOOK2:「I’m good.」
“What…?” Su Xue mumbled. She looked from Lin Feng to the now closed chat and back at Lin Feng again. Has he lost it? He has, hasn’t he? She grabbed Lin Feng by the arm and pointed at his computer screen. She said, “What are you doing? Why did you close the chat? That’s Lightless! Didn’t I tell you who that is? He’s a pro! He plays in the LPL! Why would you say no to him? He can help you win! He’s a mid main, but he’s also a really good Jungler! I told you this last time! Before he became a mid main he was a Jungler! Why wouldn’t you wanna duo with him!?”
Lin Feng brushed Su Xue’s hand off and explained, “Doesn’t matter who he is. I prefer to play solo queue. Plus, I want to do this climb solo.” He focused his attention on the client. I promised One that I’d reach the Top 5! So I’ll be the one doing that! I won’t rely on anyone else! Duo queuing is cheating!
✹
The period between the World Championships and the start of the new season was the off-season for League of Legends. The professional teams had no specific games to work towards, so they focused on general practice. Beyond that, most players had no team responsibilities. They spent their time watching movies, playing other video games or going outside into the cold winter weather.
It was 2 A.M. Light was still burning in the Dark Glory gaming room. Two players from the team were watching a movie, and there was one other player present. Lightless. He sat behind his own computer some distance away. He looked at his screen, at his chat with CN•HOOK2 and grinned. Hum… Could’ve guessed One wouldn’t want to duo queue with me. But he accepted me to his friends list! That’s already a huge honour! Now I can spectate him! I wonder how many people have that privilege! Maybe I’m his only friend on the Korean server!
Lightless’ eyes were locked on the screen when CN•HOOK2 entered his first game. Mid Lulu! That’s such a risky pick in the solo queue! He’s basically relying on his teammates not being dogshit! Hum… But this is Korean Challenger! He clenched his fists. Come on, One! Show ‘em!
The next hour flew by. Lightless felt his heart slamming into his ribcage, faster and faster! The Lulu game was impressive. CN•HOOK2 carried his team to a convincing victory. He moved into the next game, this time opting to play Ezreal in the mid lane. The early game was a little bit rough. There were a couple of openings and a couple of missed opportunities. But when the mid game came around, Ezreal hit his power spike. CN•HOOK2 carried his team to a second win.
It was the third game where CN•HOOK2 finally hit a wall. Lightless kept shaking his head the entire game. Holy crap his Fizz is good! Laning, roaming, mechanics, especially mechanics! They’re all better than mine! This dude could jump straight into the LPL and be one of the top Midlaners! Fucking legend! Retired from the pro scene of a different MOBA so many years ago, yet he’s still playing at the top level! And isn’t he like 30 already? How is he this sharp at that age!? Hum… Unreal! He watched One beat a Korean professional player in the mid lane. But it wasn’t enough. He lost the game. One’s teammates were useless in this game! And those Koreans were pros… That didn’t help.
Lightless rolled his shoulders back and mumbled, “Alright, next game. Get some revenge for that loss, bud!” he rubbed his hands and smiled. Show me… Twisted Fate! Yeah! Nice!
The game didn’t last long. CN•HOOK2’s Twisted Fate dominated his lane and at Level 6 after unlocking his ultimate skill, he started dominating the bot and top lane as well. The game lasted 21 minutes. Lightless’ eyes were open wide in shock. Hum… Yep! That does it. That fucking does it! He glanced at his two teammates watching another movie before turning his attention back to his screen. He shook his head and breathed in deeply. I can’t let myself fall behind a retired player! One is an absolute legend! No one was as good as he was at his prime! But he’s like 30 years old now! He’s well past his prime and he doesn’t even play competitively anymore! I’m not going to be worse than him! Hum! I’ll just have to up my training schedule and try even harder! He nodded and clicked on the ‘Play’ button. Enough watching. Time to practice!
Jackie Boy!
Announcement:
This is a half merge. One and a half chapters! The other half got added to tomorrow’s chapter!
Translator Thought:
Sietse Thought:
Jackie woke up at night. The moon was up high in the sky, casting its pale white light on his face. He blinked a couple times and searched for his warm blanket to cuddle. Huh? Where…? He shot up straight and looked around. How did I get here!? School? He suddenly noticed the soft, damp grass tickling his toes. And naked. Very, very naked. NO! MY CLOTHES? WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES!? Did I just… He looked across the campus at the window of Mrs. Burkley’s classroom. The lights were still on. Did I just…? He looked down at his penis, and squinted. It’s too dark, yeah, too dark!
“Ey lookie there! We gotta Jackie boy up at night!” screamed the class idiot.
Jackie abruptly turned his head. His bully, a kid with barely enough brain function to put one foot in front of the other, stood there. Pointing. Laughing! I’m naked! He sees my penis! I’M NAKED! Jackie covered his penis with his hands and looked around for anywhere he could hide. Until he saw the tree. It rose so majestically above the ground. Strong and firm it stood. Like me! Totally! He ran towards and jumped at it, just like he saw people in the movies do it. His arms wrapped around a branch and he pulled himself up on it.
A second idiot stumbled onto the campus ground. He followed his friend’s gaze and locked onto Jackie. He laughed and shouted, “Oi Jackie! Come ‘ere and lemme give yuh a spankin’! I know ya like ‘em!”
ShitShitShit! Jackie’s stomach twisted into a knot. His muscles were all tense and his eyes were locked on the top of the three. They can’t see me there! I just have to get there! They’ll leave me alone if I get there! It won’t be fun if they can’t see my tiny weewee! He clambered up the tree, pushing his way through the twigs and leaves. The branches became thinner the higher he got, but the darkness wrapped tighter around him. It helped him feel safe. They won’t see me up here. I’ll be safe!
The class idiot, king of his kind, saw his victim escaping. He narrowed his eyes and wracked his brain good and hard and long. Eye got this! Lemme tink, just tink real hard! Eye can! He stuck his tongue out of his mouth and chewed on it. Get ‘im down from up there… He looked around the ground, illuminated by the light coming from the classrooms behind him.
Second of their kind, worse even than his king, the second idiot looked down at the ground. At the pebbles on the gravel path. “I know! Throw ‘em dings at him!” He grinned and grabbed a handful of pebbles from the ground. Then he ran towards the tree that Jackie was still desperately climbing and started throwing rocks, laughing loudly.
“Ey! Good plan man!” King Stupid cheered. He grabbed his own handful of pebbles and chased after his friend. At the tree, he put one foot in front of the other—proudly—and hurled a rock.
“AOAOOO!” Jackie screamed in pain. He yelled, “My butt! You hit my butt!” He looked down at the base of the tree. His two bullies stood there, grinning, throwing rocks at him. They can still see me! My tiny weewee! He bit on his lips and then shouted, “Leave me alone! Just leave me alone! Stop bullying me!” But that only ignited the power with which the two bullies threw their rocks. A prop appeared in Jackie’s throat. Tears welled in his eyes which he quickly wiped. He quietly mumbled, “Mommie…”
AND THEN SHANKS WOKE UP!
Shanks Thought: I… have no words. I was telling Sietse about the continuation of my dream escapades. You know, the continuous series of odd streams I’ve been having over these past few weeks? He went oddly silent during the whole thing, and now I know why.
Yeah, last night I dreamt I was in the middle of my old middle school field. Naked. And with no idea how I got there or why I was there.Sadly, I didn’t get long to ponder on my situation because I was quickly spotted by one of the special ed kids in my school. Panicking, I decided the best course of action to get away from him was to climb up a nearby tree. I got spotted anyway. And the little fucker started throwing rocks at me. If that wasn’t enough, he called his special ed friend over so the two could throw rocks at me together. While I was naked. On top of a tree.
I don’t know. The situation was too chaotic and confusing for my mind to parse.
The only conclusion I can come to is that this dream is the sequel to the previous night’s dream where I was back in middle school, bonking my old middle school teacher. Maybe I’ll dream up the events that bridge these two dreams together tonight?
Sietse Addendum: How funny would it be if Shanks now has a nightmare about this Translator Thought?
Shanks Thought: I already had the nightmare. Dumbass. >_>