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A Fire That Will Burn a Legend to Ashes!

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Season had put a stop to SSK’s unbeaten streak! SSK’s perfect run ended in the Finals! The entire world of League of Legends, with the sole exception of South-Korea, took to the internet to share the joy. They crashed forums and message boards! And they flooded the stream chats of the various official broadcasts.

SSK ISNT INRINSIBLE!!!!!
korean killleeerrrrrssssssssssssss
SUCK ON THAT! stupid koreans and their “eternal” reign… NOOOBBBBSSSSSS
lololololol ssk sucks!!!!! NA BEST REGION IN DA HOLE WITE WORLLDDDD!!!11
were gonna winnnn woorrllddddssssssss SEASON <33333
ROFLMAO!!! HARHARHAR!!!! ssk nubs. Confirmed.

Lee Dojae sat in a skybox high up in the Mercedes Benz Arena, scrolling through the stream chats from various regions. Why are these people so stupid? Can’t they see that SSK is going to win this? He looked out the window at the venue down below, annoyed. 17,000 people here to watch SSK become World Champions… And tens of millions fans all across the world to witness Rake step up to the top of the esports scene again! But Season wasn’t giving him the show he wanted. He narrowed his eyes as he looked at Autumn. He really is talented. They only won the previous game because of his Thresh hooks. Three in one teamfight… That was fucking ridiculous! He pursed his lips, but then shrugged. Eh, whatever. It was just one good game from them. That won’t be enough. I personally trained Han Seho. Rake will carry this. SSK will become world champion and the name Rake will be synonymous for best in the world again!

Season wasn’t planning to give Lee Dojae what he wanted. The players sat behind their computers, completely focused. Their coach was talking them through the strategy for the next game, and telling them what to watch out for. His message was clear. If they wanted to win the Finals, and they did, then they had to win Game 3 and Game 4. They absolutely couldn’t let SSK gather any momentum!

Autumn tried to keep a calm expression and listen to his coach. But he couldn’t get himself to. He looked over the edge of his monitor at SSK. At Rake. They haven’t shown everything yet. We’re going at it with all we’ve got, but they’re still holding back. His eyebrows twitched and he frowned. How do we win this? It’s only going to get harder from here. We already threw everything we had at the first two games… And we only won the second one. How are we supposed to win two more? Can we even win two more…? He bit down on his tongue and shook his head. It’s going to be really difficult. But we can do it!

Rake sat up straight in his chair with his eyes closed. Their coach had already informed them of the strategy for the next game, and now his teammates were chatting together about bratwurst, beer, and the Oktoberfest. He didn’t participate. We’ve had our fun. I won’t let this go on. He took a deep, calming breath. Then his eyes shot open. Focused. He put his right hand on his mouse, feeling its weight in his grasp, and placed his left hand on the keyboard. It’s time to end this.

High School 13’s esports team was watching the World Finals in a private room at the NetCow Cafe. SSK and Season had entered Champion Select. After a quick ban phase, which was again focused on banning Rake and Autumn’s favourite champions, they started locking in champions. Season’s first pick was Jarvan IV. Then SSK locked in Ahri and Lee Sin.

Ouyang’s eyes went wide. He threw his chair around and shouted, “Ahri and Lee Sin! SSK is copying BunBun’s strategy! THEY’RE STEALING OUR COMP!” He then turned back to look at the screen and continued, “Bros… They’re playing our team comp! Rake and Mafa are going to play our team comp!”

Liu Yue completely forgot about wanting to see Season win Worlds. He nodded fervently and said, “It’s awesome! We’re drafting the same champions as top, world class pro teams! Lin Feng and BunBun are our very own Rake and Mafa! Woo!”

Yang Fan adjusted his glasses and said, “The Ahri-Lee Sin combo is really strong in the current meta. But it’s also really hard to pull off. Then again, Rake and Mafa are arguably the best Mid-Jungle combo in the world. And Rake is the best player in the world. I really want to see how they’re going to play this game.” He then turned to An Xin and asked, “What do you think?”

An Xin smiled and replied, “Yep, you’re right. Those two are two of the best players in the world. Rake the Emperor and Mafa the King. And it was to be expected that the best teams in the world would notice how strong the Ahri-Lee Sin combo is right now. I’m kind of surprised we haven’t seen it earlier.” She paused for a moment and then added, “Rake and Mafa have been practicing this combo for weeks now, so they’re going to be a lot better at it than Lin Feng and me. I’m also curious to see how they do. And how much better they are.”

Lin Feng sat up straight in his chair, staring intently at the screen. “Better for now,” he said to An Xin. He didn’t smile, but he didn’t look worried either. There was only the strong determination that radiated from his eyes. “We’re going to beat them.”

The first two games had given Season fans all the hope they needed. They even started whispering about winning the world title. And Korean Killers became the most searched term on the internet. Then Game 3 happened. Rake’s Ahri and Mafa’s Lee Sin worked together flawlessly. It was as if they were of one mind and body. They decimated Season in the mid lane, then went on to roam around the map, picking up kills everywhere.

SSK had complete control over Summoner’s Rift after only 10 minutes. The players from Season were afraid to even walk out of their base, terrified to get caught out by Ahri and Lee Sin. One Charm from Ahri was all it took to give yet another kill to SSK. This went on until the 26th minute, when SSK steamrolled Season’s base and destroyed their Nexus.

Back in the NetCow Cafe, Ouyang and Liu Yue sat next to each other with their mouths hanging wide open. They glanced at each other and mumbled in unison, “Wow!”

“What was that?” Ren Rou said, dazed. Game 3 of the World Finals had looked like a typical solo queue game. As if two Challenger players had created smurf accounts to toy around in Silver. It was an absolute slaughter and simply painful to watch.

“Mhm. SSK is really good,” Tang Bingyao noted.

An Xin nodded and then turned around to look at Lin Feng, who sat in the far back of the room. Are you ok? You haven’t said a word… She watched him sit there in silence, lost in his thoughts. He hadn’t said a single word all game. An Xin bit on her lip, then shook her head and looked back at the stream. You’ll get your revenge.

The North American fans saw their hopes of an American World Champion evaporate in Game 3. Season had nothing to bring in from start to finish. Rake and Mafa demonstrated to the world what perfect synergy was! They tore Season apart with an absolutely stunning Ahri-Lee Sin display! And they helped SSK steamroll to a 26 minute victory.

Come on, Season! You guys can do this! You have it in you! Just dig deep!
WERE THE KOREAN KILLERS! PLLSSSSSSS
ONE TIME! JUST ONE TIME! Please, God, I’m begging you! Let Season win this!
we can do this! Just gotta belliieeeevvveeeeeeeeee!!!!
Don’t give those Koreans another win! COME ON SEASON! I”M ROOTING FOR YOU!!!!
I’ll get a tattoo of Autumn on my ass if Season win this!

But all the support in the world wasn’t going to carry Season to a win. SSK was just too good. Game 4 was almost an exact copy of Game 3. Rake and Mafa slaughtered Season’s Midlaner and then started terrorizing the rest of the map. Season had nowhere to go and soon found themselves pushed back into their base. But that didn’t save them either. In the 26th minute, SSK destroyed Season’s Nexus and crowned themselves World Champion!

The League of Legends Season 5 World Championship Finals ended in a 3-1 victory for SSK. They became the first team in League of Legends history to win the World Championships two times in a row, with their starplayer Rake achieving a record third world title!

The Mercedes Benz Arena shook, but it wasn’t an earthquake. The people in the stadium were just losing it! They were stamping their feet on the ground. They were jumping, dancing, and screaming their lungs out! There was a new world champion!

“SSK BEST IN THE WORLD!”
“RAKE MVP! BEST PLAYER IN THE WORLD!”
“MAFA FOR EMPEROR!”
“WE’RE THE BEST REGION IN THE WORLD!”
“WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
“WORLD CHAMPIONS! WE’RE THE WORLD CHAMPIONS!”

SSK’s members shot up from their gaming chairs, throwing their arms in the air to celebrate. They had defended their world title! Then Rake led them across the stage to shake hands with Season, before walking over to the middle of the stage and bowing towards each section of the audience. A show of gratitude to everyone who’d come out to support them. And the final bow was toward the camera, to thank the tens of millions of people who’d turned on the stream and were watching them.

From his skybox, Lee Dojae finally let out a long held breath. There wasn’t any real suspension at the end of Game 4, but he still got nervous. Now he smiled. I made the right choice. Han Seho is the perfect new Rake. Then he got up from his seat and mumbled, “Good. Now there’s only one more thing left to do.”

The League of Legends World Championships host stood on the stage with a microphone in his hand. The audience had quieted down when he started talking, “Riot Games has invited a special guest this year for the award ceremony! You may know him for his achievements that have landed him a spot in the Esports Hall of Fame. He was the old team captain of SSK and also played with the online handle Rake! Give a warm welcome to Lee Dojae!”

Lee Dojae smiled as he heard the audience cheer at the mention of his name. He looked at the Summoner’s Cup in his hands. This is my moment. I’m starting a new era of esports. From one Rake to the next! From legend to legend! My name will live on forever! He nodded at himself, then slowly walked up on stage, waving at the audience.

The five main players on SSK’s roster stood in the middle of the stage, with the two coaches and substitutes behind them. All of them turned to look at Lee Dojae as he walked up on stage. They bowed towards him in respect and kept their heads down until he stood in front of them.

Lee Dojae smiled a little brighter. Then he walked up to Han Seho and said,  “Good. You didn’t disappoint me.”

Han Seho bowed again and replied, “I’m glad I met your expectations, sir.”

Lee Dojae nodded and said, “Then I’m handing this, and everything that comes with it, over to you.” He offered the Summoner’s Cup to Han Seho. To Rake. I’m giving it to myself.

Han Seho took the Summoner’s Cup and assured, “I accept it. You can entrust everything to me.”He then turned away from Lee Dojae and looked at the audience. There was a brief pause, just long enough for the camera to focus on him. Then he raised the Summoner’s Cup high above his head.

The Summoner’s Cup represented the passing of the torch from Rake Sr. to Rake Jr.. It was a moment that every Korean talk show had been hyping up towards! That every Korean esports fan had been waiting for! It was a reaffirmation that they were the best esports region in the world! No one could compete against them! And the world had to know that! This entire award ceremony was orchestrated to give a single message to every other region and every other professional player in the world: “Korea is number one! The rest of you noobs have fun fighting for second best!”

The camera focused on Han Seho and the large cup in his hands. Then it zoomed out and showed how the other members of the team gathered around their starplayer and celebrated the victory. One by one, they took the trophy and lifted it up above their heads. They were World Champions! Again!

Lee Dojae watched Han Seho celebrate the victory in the Finals of the League of Legends Season 5 World Championships with the rest of SSK. He nodded at himself and smiled. I made the name. And I won with that name. Now you have it. Take good care of it! And remember, Rake will always stand at the top! I will always stand at the top! Don’t ever let that change.

Lin Feng watched every minute and every second of the League of Legends World Finals. How Rake destroyed Season’s Midlaner. How Rake annihilated Season. How Rake lifted up the Summoner’s Cup! I’m taking you down! Lin Feng clenched his fist and he started smiling. You’re good. Really good. But I have time. And I have the talent to beat you! His smile grew into a wide grin. I lost. Yes. You beat me! But that was four years ago. Now I’m back. A blazing fire of determination ignited in Lin Feng’s eyes! I’m coming for you!

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Shanks Gets A Crush On His Professor!

Sietse Thought: Let me start off by saying that Shanks is a commie dictator. Reddit taught me that today. I’m glad I finally know the truth! Now, I remember a long time ago that we made a couple of jokes about Didac and his chemistry teacher (Hey, Didac!). Turns out, Shanks also has a crush on his new teacher! From the moment he got his first class from her, he started talking about her. His first excuse had to do with her name. Shankland. You guys get it. Shankland, Shanks… “Harhar, we’re soulmates.”

Now, here I thought he was just making a joke and having a laugh. After spending the last several hours listening to him making the same joke about her over and over again, I’m not so sure anymore. He has that wistful sound in his voice when he talks about her. It really is quite cute. He unfortunately hasn’t offered us a picture yet. I’m hoping next time he has a class from her, he’ll stream it. Maybe on Twitch and then he can profess his love to her, the old and greying professor! YOU GO, SHANKS! We’re here for you when she turns you down!

Shanks Thought: I didn’t mention it that many times, okay! It’s interesting! It’s not everyday you meet another Shanks. It’s you guys misunderstanding things. Anyway, enough about that. My feelings are now hurt, guys. I offered to send both Sietse and Devshard chocolate for Valentine’s Day, and both of them cruelly rejected me. Neither of them want my chocolate. Who am I supposed to send my chocolate now? Will any dear reader accept my chocolate? 

Actually, guys. I’m now thinking back to Valentine’s Day in middle school and high school, and I don’t think I’ve ever gotten any chocolate from anybody. Well, maybe some friendship chocolates. But those don’t count. Either Valentine’s Day isn’t actually important as people make it out to be on TV and people don’t actually give each other chocolate. Or I’m a sad lonely sack that nobody gave chocolate too. I would obviously prefer the former. But even if it’s the latter, I’m okay with that too. I’m perfectly happy being among my fellow normies! Plus, post Valentine’s Day chocolates are cheap and delicious.

Dev  Thought: There’s a lot that concerns me here. Just so many things. Okay. The first thing that makes me really concerned is that Shanks grew up in Canada and lived there for most of his life. But he still thinks that obligatory friendship chocolates are a thing there. In case the rest of you don’t know, that’s a thing they do in Japan. It gets talked about in a lot of anime and manga. Girls give their guy friends chocolates on Valentine’s Day there. Those are store-bought chocolate gifts that they call “obligatory chocolate”. But for their significant other/crush/the guy they’re hoping to get jiggy with, they actually spend the time making chocolates at home. It’s a big thing. Minor cultural trivia lesson done now. The weird part is that Shanks is such a weeb that he thinks they do obligatory chocolates in North America.

For those of you not from NA, we do not do that here. It used to be a thing when we were very young. Like in Kindergarten to maybe 4th grade at the most. And it gets kinda awkward in 4th grade if your school continues it that late. 

Why is Shanks such a weeb?

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