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Your team has destroyed a turret!

At 13 minutes, Lin Feng and An Xin had destroyed Shanghai High School’s outer tower in the mid lane, while Shanghai High School had killed Tang Bingyao’s Vayne. Both sides looked towards the Dragon. Lin Feng was the first to walk down the river towards the Dragon pit, with An Xin following right behind him. They dropped down wards near the river entrances to guard against any potential flanks from Shanghai High School.

Zeng Rui also decided to head for the Dragon pit. He said over the team’s voice chat, “Stop them at Dragon.” After which he had his Nami move up into the river. The Jinx and Elise followed right behind him, all three of them dropping down wards where they could. Zeng Rui didn’t feel like getting blindsided again and kept hammering on the need for more wards. They arrived at the Dragon pit at the same time as Lin Feng and An Xin. Both teams started firing off skillshots at each other, looking for an opening or a play.

“This’ll be interesting!” Westwind’s voice boomed through the venue. “Shanghai High School is the stronger team right now. 3vs2 and all! No way that Zeng Rui is going to give the Dragon to High School 13! Look at how they’re only using poking abilities. They’re saving all their crowd control for the engage.”

Silent Reed nodded and said, “This is going to be a feisty one! Fireworks and the whole shabingle! But they’re patient. Shanghai High School is waiting for the Syndra to finally arrive! That’s also giving High School 13’s Vayne the time to respawn and join the fight again! It’s just… That Vayne is in a pretty bad spot right now. She must be feeling terrible.”

Shanghai High School had a lot going for them in terms of kills and item advantages, especially between ad-carries. But it wasn’t all good news for them. Jinx and Syndra, their two main damage carries, didn’t have Flash available. They had to play a lot more carefully, because one misstep was it for them. So they sat in the back, hiding far behind their Darius and Elise, and waited for an angle to dash out some damage.

At 13:50 minutes, all hell broke loose. High School 13 had retreated back into their own Jungle near the Blue Buff Camp. They played around with the vision there, trying to land skillshots that Shanghai High School didn’t see coming. An Xin finally fired off a Sonic Wave that connected with Shanghai High School’s Elise. A pair of eyes and a half moon appeared above the Elise, covered in a blue radiance. Lee Sin knew exactly where his target was. He could dash towards her and attack!

Lin Feng was getting bored with playing it safe. So, when An Xin hit the Sonic Wave, he shot up straight in his chair and shouted over the team’s voice chat, “Nice! Awesome! Go in! GoGoGoGO!”

“I’m not deaf! Stop shouting in my ears!” An Xin shouted. One, she didn’t need her ears blown off by Lin Feng. And two, she didn’t need Lin Feng telling her to go in. She knew that perfectly well herself. She pressed down on the Q key to activate the second half of her skill–Resonating Strike! The Lee Sin dashed towards the Elise. Then he placed a ward behind the Elise and hopped towards it–Safeguard! He was right in front of the Jinx, who didn’t have her Flash available. But he did. He blinked past her, turned around, and sent her flying towards High School 13’s team with a roundhouse kick–Dragon’s Rage!

“YEEEEEEEKUUUUUUUUUUUUH!” Lee Sin’s voice boomed out from the speakers in the venue, quickly followed by the deafening cheers of the audience. It all happened so fast! One moment the two teams were trying to get some poke in on each other. The next, Jinx was flying over towards High School 13’s team!

“Nice! We got her! Gimme the kill! Gimme gimme gimme!” Lin Feng exclaimed as he pressed down on his R key–Spirit Dash! His Ahri jumped forward, firing off an essence bolt at the Jinx who was still in midair. Then she aimed her Charm at the Jinx. Charmed! The Jinx was infatuated with the Ahri and started slowly ambling towards her like a love struck puppy. The Ahri activated her remaining two skills, Orb of Deception and Fox-Fire. The orb that Ahri always carried with her flew through the Jinx and then back again, while three Fox-Fires shot towards the Jinx and burned away what little remained of her health.

《You have slain an enemy!》

Shanghai High School lost their main carry before the fight had even started! This was a massive blow to team morale! Worse even, the Darius had flashed forward to try and stop the Ahri. But not only did he fail to stop her, his Flash was also completely wasted. Ahri’s ultimate skill had three charges. She used one to get close to the Jinx, and the other two to run away from the Darius. Shanghai High School’s Toplaner was cursing relentlessly at himself. He was so far out of position that his team couldn’t help him. High School 13’s Dr. Mundo was hurling cleavers at him, while Vayne started firing off silver bolts.

The fight started at the Jungle entrance near the Red Team’s Blue Buff Camp. It was a funnel point that Shanghai High School was afraid to step into. The Syndra moved forward, intending to help her team, but a Death Sentence came flying at her from the fog of war. By the time she saw it, she was already hooked. Shanghai High School’s Midlaner followed the example of their Toplaner and started cursing over the team’s voice chat.

Zeng Rui shouted over the team’s voice chat, “Quiet and focus! Wait for my call to retreat.” Then he pressed down on the R key in an attempt to give his teammates a way out–Tidal Wave! His Nami called forth a wave that surged through the funnel, knocking four High School 13 champions up into the air! Then she threw an Aqua Prison towards the fifth player before turning around and running away. Zeng Rui ordered over the team’s voice chat, “Now. Retreat!”

The Elise followed closely behind the Nami and got away from High School 13. But the Syndra was still hooked by the Thresh and Darius was slowed by Dr. Mundo’s cleavers. Neither was able to get away with their lives. Their screens turned grey and their Champions were sent back to the fountain. The teamfight was a resounding victory for High School 13, which was made even sweeter when they took the Dragon on the back of it. The first Dragon Buff granted bonus attack damage and ability power. High School 13 had turned their fortune in the span of one teamfight. They went from falling behind to being back in the driver’s seat!

Westwind shot up from his seat and shouted out, “OH MY! Beautiful! That was absolutely stunning! STUNNING!” Then he moved his microphone to just above the caster desk. He raised his hand and then smacked it down as hard as he could. The microphone picked up the impact sound and sent it booming through the speakers in the venue, silencing the audience. He smiled and continued, “This wasn’t a High School 13 win. It wasn’t! This was a Mid-Jungle win! That Ahri and Lee Sin are so good together! It’s like they can read each other’s minds! Their synergy is definitely over 9000!”

Silent Reed asked, “How many times is this now? Three? Four? I hope we get to see more of them. I’ll never get bored of watching those two play. They’re so good together…”

“Fourth. Must be the fourth time already! It’s insane!” Westwind replied. He shook his head and continued, “They’re such a scary combo. Shit. That Lee Sin and Ahri are like a match made in Heaven! The best of the best! You can call them high schoolers all you want, but they look better than most professional players! Watch my words, those two are going to make it big! I’ll eat my shoes if they’re not going pro!”

Westwind and Silent Reed were saying what everyone else was thinking. From first time League of Legends viewers to professional players and coaches, they all agreed that the way Lin Feng and An Xin were playing together was something special. Coaches from all the different professional teams were looking at their lineups and seeing how they could fit these two monster talents in. Because the way that Lin Feng and An Xin picked off the Jinx was a work of art, something that belonged in the LPL. They belonged in the LPL.

Zeng Rui sat back in his chair, frowning. This game was entirely outside even his wildest predictions and expectations. I screwed up. My calculations are off. I didn’t expect the thundering dumbass to be so good. I didn’t expect that dumb coach to be so good. But we can work around that. I just don’t know how to work around them when they’re playing together. How do you stop… that? Shit! How are they this good? It’s ridiculous! That’s what it is! Just… how?

Zeng Rui shook his head, his brain functioning at a hundred and twenty per cent. He had to come up with a method to deal with the Ahri and Lee Sin. Those two were too strong together. Dammit! They knew this. They knew! That Ahri is fed, she can blow up whoever she wants and the Lee Sin just helps with the engage! We can’t win a fight right now… He let out a deep, long sigh. And we’ll lose the late game as well. When all champions are Level 18 and have five or six items, Dr. Mundo and Vayne are better than Darius and Jinx. Now or late game, it doesn’t matter. They prepared for every perceivable situation and are now just bringing this win home. Did she really think all of this out? Shit! She’s scary.

Once Zeng Rui understood that the game was lost, he got very practical. He told his teammates it was over, and that they were going to drag it out for as long as they could, so that he could review their approach for the next game and double and triple check whether they needed to make any last minute changes. I really dislike making last minute changes. But I might have to. I can’t be stubborn and refuse to see the problems. Something has to give, or we’re losing the next game as well. Damn it. We lost. We lost again. Shit!

Tang Bingyao and Chen Ze never got the chance to build the items they needed to become a threat in this game. Lin Feng and An Xin carried High School 13 to a win long before that. At 29 minutes, they forced another teamfight and aced Shanghai High School. Then they killed Baron Nashor and recalled back to base to spend their gold. A minute later, they were storming down the mid lane and besieged Shanghai High School’s base. The siege lasted exactly 20 seconds, when An Xin’s Lee Sin landed another vital Sonic Wave. The resulting teamfight was a one-sided stomp. High School 13 lost one champion while acing Shanghai High School for a second time. Then they destroyed the inhibitor tower, the inhibitor, the nexus towers, and finally the Nexus. A red victory crest floated up over the screen.


“WOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Westwind cried out into his microphone. “HIGH SCHOOL 13 HAS DONE IT FOR A SECOND TIME! They’re up 2-1 in the Finals of the Shanghai 16 School Tournament! One more win! One more win is all they need to win the whole tournament! Who would’ve thought? No one, right?” He chuckled before continuing, “But here we are. MATCH POINT FOR HIGH SCHOOL 13, WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Silent Reed was on her feet as well and shouted, “AMAZING! Beautiful! What a game by them! What a game by Lin Feng and An Xin! They carried this game so hard! They’re really something special together. Oh Em G. That was so impressive!”

The audience was up on their feet, jumping and shouting for the two players of the match. Lin Feng and An Xin’s performance was so good that the rest of High School 13’s team might as well not have been there! No one noticed the stunned expressions of Wei Dong and Chen Ze as they stared at the victory screen, deeply impressed by Lin Feng and An Xin. Nor did anyone notice Tang Bingyao bordering on the verge of tears. The audience only cared about Lin Feng and An Xin right now!

“AHHHHHH! Those two are soooooooo good!”
“Are we up? Are we really winning? Tell me, are we winning? Am I seeing this right? Ohhhh!”
“Hahaha! No more losers! High School 13 is finally good for something thanks to Lin Feng and An Xin! You two are the best! WHAAAAAAA!”

Cooking & LonelyBoi Shanks

Shanks Thought: Sietse has been getting more and more into cooking lately, and I’m super proud of him. I could’ve never imagined this when I first met him years ago. He was that one friend who was completely no nonsense about food. He only saw it as sustenance, and was perfectly fine eating the same bland crap every day. It was like the concept of putting effort into making your meals enjoyable was completely foreign to him. For example, he used to eat his sandwiches with only bread, meat, and lettuce. No cheese. No butter. No mayo. Even a simple vinaigrette or squeeze of lemon in a salad would be too much for him, and he would eat it raw. Now, though. he’s regularly telling me about all the cool dishes he’s been cooking. He even sent me a Snap today of a delicious chocolate cake that he baked!

I’d like to think this change was spurred on by my influence, that my love of food and delicious things slowly swayed his opinion. But in reality, he just got a girlfriend that likes to cook. Which works out perfectly fine for me too. Maybe that’ll inspire him to actually do something about improving his cooking space. Last time I was there and tried cooking a meal, it was awful. The knives were so dull that I was terrified I would slip and cut myself while trying to butterfly some chicken. The heat distribution on the pan was also so crap that I ended up boiling the chicken instead of pan frying it.

So yeah, I’m super happy for Sietse and I wanted to share it with you guys. Also, I was hoping to gather my fellow lonely, sad sack normies in the comments to help me curse at him! Sietse has his girlfriend. Devs got his Tamagotchi. But what do I have?

Sietse Thought: Bish. The recipe calls it a white velvet cake, I’ll have you know (if there’s interest I’ll throw a pic on the Discord)! Now Shanks could’ve had the honour of getting me into cooking. He could’ve made me realize that food is so much more than the same old shit you put in your mouth everyday. But no. Shanks makes terrible chicken (really terrible) and then blames the utensils that were totally not as dull as he makes them sound. My kitchen is good and the utensils are sharp!

Anyway, Shanks is just cranky that he wasn’t the one who got me to start cooking. Funny thing, it wasn’t the girl either. Well, not directly anyway. She told me about this study that shows that people who eat meat are like 20% more likely to get cancer (the exact percentage might be off, but it’s high as all fucks). My normal dinner was meat plus something else. But meat just isn’t the same anymore. It still tastes good, but… The cancer thing is nagging at the back of my mind the whole time and I just can’t enjoy the meat as much. So I’ve started to care more about what I eat, and in the process I learned that food can actually taste good. Who knew?

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