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Cup Noodles’ Tristana was only Level 5. She had pushed the minion wave in bot lane, which had cost her a fair bit of health, before coming mid. And now the Level 7 Orianna attacked her with several skills. Each dealing substantial damage. Her health was dipping low, only a few more hits from death. This was something the Ahri wouldn’t let happen. She dashed toward her ad-carry to support her, firing off an essence bolt at Orianna–Spirit Rush! The Tristana wasn’t on the same page. She just wanted to get away, but her Flash was on cooldown. So she started running. Running into the Sejuani.

The Sejuani appeared from the bottom side river brush. She Arctic Assaulted into the Tristana, knocking her Airborne, and then threw a Glacial Prison! A bola flew at the Tristana, and the Ahri next to her, freezing the Tristana and slowing the Ahri. The Tristana couldn’t move. She couldn’t do anything for the next 1s. The Orianna moved toward the Tristana and commanded her Ball to attack while throwing out an auto attack.

《Killing spree!》

Cup Noodles stared at his screen. It was grey. His Tristana was dead. He’d died in a Gold game. A Master on the Ionia server had just been killed by some random Gold player on the Korea server. He didn’t know what to say or do, so he just sat there, staring at his screen.

Old Huang was also silent. He watched the fight happen on his recording software and hit replay. Then he watched it again, and one more time. “U-uhm…” He was searching for the words, but they sounded wrong. They sounded impossible. He still asked the question, “D-did you just get outplayed?”

“N-no, I-i, t-this…” Cup Noodles stuttered.

Cup Noodles knew it and Old Huang knew it. The Orianna had outplayed Cup Noodles. For some reason, this Gold rank player knew how much damage she had and that she had enough to kill the Tristana. But that could also be explained as an overly confident play. Those happened all the time in Gold. The real surprise was pulling the Tristana out of her Rocket Jump. The Orianna used her ultimate in the exact moment that it would shock the Tristana out of her escape. That took actual skill, or more luck than most people found in a lifetime of playing video games.

“… was luck, right? I-it has to be!”

Old Huang blew out some smoke rings, then shook his head and shrugged. “Who cares what that was? That Orianna got the fancy play, not you. I need you to do that. Those are the plays I need. Just do what that Orianna is doing!”

Cup Noodles chuckled, though he didn’t sound happy. It was more of a worried confusion. He slammed his hand down on his desk and said, “It’s fine! Really! It’s all fine. That was just a small slip up. Nothing to get worried about. I won’t do it again. Don’t worry. I got this!”

“Alright, I believe you. Just stop messing around,” Old Huang sighed. He then glanced at mid lane. At the Orianna. She was 3/0/0 and had almost double Ahri’s creep score.

Cup Noodles had had his fun. It was time to get serious. He had to if he wanted to win this game. Fortunately, he was still a Master on the Ionia server. As much as this game wasn’t going his way right now, he was a really good player. When he returned to bot lane, he did what he did best, carrying. He pushed the lane towards the Blue team’s outer tower and kept poking the Jinx. Then, at 10 minutes, his Nami support threw a bubble that connected with the Jinx–Aqua Prison! The Jinx floated in the air, unable to do anything. Cup Noodles had his Tristana jump in and kill the Jinx. He didn’t even care for the tower aggro, because of Tristana’s Rocket Jump. This skill reset on a kill. So after bursting the Jinx down, he jumped back out and laughed into his microphone, “Haha! Pretty slick, eh? What do you think? That’s what you want, right?”

“Slick my ass! Hurry the fuck up! That Orianna is coming for you!” Old Huang shouted back over voice chat. He could already see what was going to happen. It was all too obvious.

“Eh?” Cup Noodles muttered. He looked at his minimap, where he found Orianna almost arriving at bot lane. “EH? How did she get here so fast!”

Cup Noodles ran towards his own outer tower. But Blue team’s Thresh wasn’t about to let this happen. The Thresh flayed the Tristana back and then threw a lantern to the river entrance. A shield wrapped around the Orianna as she was pulled to the Thresh’s side. Then she commanded her Ball to Attack and then Dissonance! The Ball shot towards the Tristana and then released a pulse of energy.

《You have been slain!》

Cup Noodles’ screen turned grey again. The announcer’s voice rang out in his ears. He stared in shock. The window on his screen showed him where most of the damage came from. Energy shots from the outer tower. He’d gone too far. His outplay had turned into a misplay real quick. Then he looked back at bot lane. The Nami was still alive. Well. She was. The Thresh and Orianna were chasing her down and had enough damage and crowd control between them. There was nothing the Nami could do.

《Enemy double kill!》

There was silence on the voice chat. Old Huang looked at the Orianna’s score. 5/0/0. And then at the 2/2/0 on Tristana. “Dammit! Who the hell’s gameplay am I recording? Yours or that Orianna’s? She looks like the Master! You look like the Gold player here!”

Lin Feng was finding a steady groove this game. Push out mid lane, maybe pick up a kill, and then go to the Wraith Camp in the jungle for some extra gold and experience. Then it was back to mid lane and pushing the minion wave out again. And when the opportunity presented itself, he’d roam down to bot lane. He had a specific purpose for these little trips down bot lane. They weren’t something obvious like gold or kills. He already had both this game, more than he could ask for even. The real reason he terrorized Red team’s Botlaners was that Tristana. The ad-carry who’d roamed up the river to gank him twice. He had to enact revenge on her!

At 13 minutes, Lin Feng roamed bot lane for the second time in the game. His presence alone made the Tristana Flash away and then Rocket Jump for good measure. The Nami didn’t have these tools at her disposal. She tried to dodge the Thresh hook but failed. Orianna’s Ball was attached to the Thresh as he pulled himself towards the Nami–Death Sentence! And that was all she wrote. The Orianna’s damage was too damn high. It was a quick and easy kill.

At 16 minutes, the Sejuani went for a gank in bot lane. Lin Feng panned his camera over and watched what happened. The Sejuani missed her ultimate, with the ice storm merely slowing the Tristana and Nami down. They had enough of a headstart to safety. With only a sliver of health, they arrived at their outer tower. But the Sejuani had a lot of health and they had almost none. The Sejuani could towerdive. So they kept running all the way back towards their inner tower.

Lin Feng recognized the opening. He was already walking through the Red team’s bottom jungle to cut off the Tristana and Nami’s path of retreat. There was an entrance to the jungle halfway between the outer and inner tower. The Tristana and Nami walked past just as Lin Feng’s Orianna arrived there. She commanded her Ball, the damage from this first attack enough to pick up another double kill!


Lin Feng smiled and muttered, “Keep coming mid. Heh. Keep coming mid…” He sounded borderline insane as he had his Orianna walk back towards mid lane, leaving behind the two bodies of his latest conquest.

Lin Feng looked down at bot lane. “Oh, another opening. This should be fun!” He’d just pushed the minion wave into Red team’s outer tower. The Ahri wasn’t there. She probably backed, or something. So he had his Orianna move down to bot lane. Through the river brush right below mid lane, and then a second brush. And then, from out the jungle they came. Ahri and Rek’Sai! They’d been waiting for him! It was an ambush!

Ahri used the first two dashes of her ultimate skill to close the distance, while Rek’Sai burrowed a tunnel to arrive right underneath Lin Feng. Then she Unburrowed. But Lin Feng wasn’t that easy to kill. His fingers glided over his keyboard. He knew precisely what to do. A quick sidestep from the Ahri’s Charm that was already flying his way, and then a Flash to dodge the knock up from the Rek’Sai. All the while, he commanded Orianna’s Ball to stay put right on top of the Rek’Sai and Ahri.

“Command: Shockwave!” Lin Feng exclaimed as he pressed down on his R key. An electromagnetic pulse ripped out from Orianna’s Ball and dragged Ahri and Rek’Sai back towards it. Then he pressed down on the W key–Command: Dissonance. A pulse of energy erupted from the Ball.

The Ahri and Rek’Sai turned around to escape. Their health bars were almost empty and they didn’t want to give any more kills to the Orianna. They ran into their jungle, towards a ward from the Blue team. This ward lit up. The Irelia was teleporting in! Behind them was a fed Orianna. In front of them was an Irelia who was more than strong enough to finish them off. There was no left or right way to escape to. They put up a last struggle before both dying. One kill went to the Irelia, the other to Orianna.


Lin Feng pressed the TAB key. It showed his kills, deaths and assists. 8/0/2. The game announcer was right. He was Legendary! “Oh, wow!” he exclaimed. Then he grinned and added, “Man, my Orianna is really awesome!”

Cup Noodles and Old Huang were also checking out the game score. More specifically, they were looking at the Orianna. The game wasn’t even 20 minutes in, yet she was already Legendary and had somehow found the time in between kills to get over 200 CS. It almost felt like it should be impossible. But this Orianna had somehow done it. At this point, it was hard to see anyone kill her, even in a 5vs1.

“It’s over…” Cup Noodles sighed and shook his head.

Old Huang lit up a new cigarette and blew out some smoke before saying, “What the hell? I recorded a highlight reel for this Orianna… Dammit! This was supposed to be a highlight reel of you! What good are you if this Orianna in a Gold game beats you!”

Cup Noodles wanted an excuse. He needed one! “Hey! I didn’t expect to run into this Ori. She’s definitely not Gold. She must be a smurf, and a really high ranked one. She’s way too good.”

Old Huang snorted. “Aren’t you a Master? What random player is better? What? Are you going to tell me this is that oh so great Midlaner from Season 1 you were talking about?”

“Haha. Maybe… I don’t know? Probably not. Doubt it.” Cup Noodles fell silent for a brief moment, thinking back to Season 1. Then he sighed. A deep and long sigh. “It’d be great if he was. He was something else. If he came back, the LPL would have an Emperor finally.”


Sietse Thought: Last night we decided to play some Among Us with some readers. I’d never played the game before, so I figured I’d just take a backseat and calmly let it all come over me. The game had other plans in store. As did the readers! Those bunch of unloyal bastards… All I wanted was to learn how to do these tasks. So, naturally I was the impostor in the first game. My only joy that game was killing one of y’all before I got tossed out of the spacecraft. Damn bastards! But ok, I was new. I didn’t know what in the world was going on. You guys got me. Good game!

Then it happened. I’d built up my confidence. I was ready to actually play the game! No more mister quiet. No! I was going to step up and show everyone how to play this damn game! So we loaded in and I started doing my tasks, keeping careful tabs on who I came across and where. I was going to find those damn impostors. And I did! I found my first! I walked into the room as he killed the innocent crewmember! So I screamed bloody murder at the top of my lungs, I let everyone know a murder had been committed and that I knew who had done it. I’d watched him just do it with my own two eyes! This couldn’t be any simpler! Or so I thought. I tell them where I found the body and that I quite literally just saw none other than our translator LittleFuckingShanks murdering a reader! He murdered one of you! But did you guys believe me? No. Of course not. I stood up for you, as I always do. I took your side and spoke up for you! To right the wrong!

Shanks was thrown out the spacecraft. And then. An emergency meeting was called. And then I was thrown off the spacecraft. We lost the game. WE LOST THE GAME, because you guys didn’t trust me. Me, the holier than thou! Now, I can find it in my heart to forgive you guys. But that forgiveness does not come for free. The next time we play together, we all vote Shanks off the spacecraft! Those are my terms.

Shanks Thought: Sietse accuses me of pulling a Su Xue and here he goes doing it too. Listen. That’s the whole point of Among Us. We all throw each other under the bus. He saw me murder a reader in cold blood, so of course I’m going throw the accusation back at him. It’s only common sense. So, if anything, don’t throw me off the spacecraft. Throw the both of us out! That’s your safest bet for when we’re playing, because Sietse won’t hesitate to murder you either! He’s just salty I won.

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